5 Key Things You Need to Know in Order to Survive Your First Year of Marriage

first-year-marriage

I was not 100% sure that my husband and I would make it past our first year of marriage.

Yep, I said it.

We were two people who loved each other but we struggled getting past our differences. We did not live together prior to getting married, so learning his habits and vice versa was extremely challenging. I felt that we would argue about the most ridiculous things like leaving the toilet seat up or putting more dishes in the sink AFTER I would wash them. Our petty fights were at an all-time high in the Middleton’s household.

Oftentimes when we would argue, neither one of us wanted to acknowledge when we were wrong, and that was a huge problem. It does not matter how much you love your husband or wife, if boundaries are not set in place, or there isn’t a safe space to communicate your true feelings, there will be a long road ahead.

After much prayer and pastoral counseling, we were able to move past a lot of tough moments. Some may ask why we would need counseling so early in our marriage, and I am here to tell you that if you are truly sincere about having a successful marriage, you will put in the work whether it’s 1 year in or 1 week in.

Marcus and I compiled a list of 5 things that helped us overcome our rocky first year of marriage. If you are about to get married or are newlyweds, this list is for you! Always remember no matter what situation you go through with your spouse, there is NOTHING too hard for God.

Jeremiah 32:27

5 things that helped us overcome our rocky first year of marriage

  1. Operate in your spouse’s love language, not yours

  2. It’s not always what you say but how you say it. 85% of most arguments are because of the person’s tone and not the actual problem

  3. Never talk bad about your spouse to anyone...PERIOD! 

  4. Compromise and share household duties* see note below

  5. It’s okay to revisit and revamp your expectations of each other. If it doesn’t work, go back to the drawing board and try again

*Does not apply if you are a stay at home wife (from tip #4)

MarriageChristian Middleton2 Comments